DON’T GIVE UP, for heaven’s sake!
I’ve been painting in Spain for the past month and wow, it just takes this girl a while to get her skills back. Know what I mean? That’s just how I roll. When I’ve been away from the brushes for a while, I require a certain amount of time to “get back into it”. Even more so when painting on location! Thank heavens I had done the 30-day drawing Challenge, which really helped me get my ‘eye’ ready. But painting can be another matter.
The first day is always full of anticipation…and consternation.
“Gee that subject is beautiful! Can I draw it? Can I paint it beautifully? Or am I going to muck it up”?
I feel like a big game hunter sitting down to site the wild beast in my scope. It’s sort of a ‘kill or be killed’ feeling. Maybe you’ve had that feeling yourself a time or two?
It’s the feeling that you sooooo want to paint something, but that little bit of doubt about how to go about it or, truth be told, even IF you CAN paint it. Yipe!
I have learned thru the years that I ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT ALLOW THESE THOUGHTS into my mind. If I start out thinking that way, all is already lost. The wild beast is headed my way with nostrils flaring and hoofs a flyin’. At all costs, I must keep my mind empty of any doubt about my own ability. I say again – AT ALL COSTS, I MUST KEEP MY MIND EMPTY OF ANY DOUBT ABOUT MY OWN ABILITY.
So, I look around for a beautiful something that really catches my eye. Then I try my best to just MAKE A START without thinking of anything except that lovely thing in front of me. I try to enjoy each little shape as it twists and turns along, joining the next shape. And what if one of those creepy doubting thoughts comes into my mind? I shove it OUT, quick as I can. For me, it’s simply a case of self-survival. Do I want to enjoy my day out in the wonderful countryside, drawing for all I’m worth? OR do I want an afternoon of gut-wrenching horror at every little mistake I make?!
That is the really cool thing about working in a travel journal format. It’s not meant to be perfect! You are trying to capture the ‘feeling’ of the place and have some fun. Maybe even experiment with new media. It’s your own private world where there are no mistakes. Only anticipation and enjoying the surroundings. Ahhhhh.
That being said, take a look at this photo.
This is my first day sketch. Not my best, for sure. I could hear Beast Breathe in my ear while working on this one! It would’ve been really easy to not finish it. But I know a little secret about myself. If I keep going, no matter what, it frees me up to just play. Who cares, anyway? It’s just my journal. Keep going and LEARN. Each ‘not-so-good’ painting is a real chance to experiment and learn. To add to the library in my head of not only what TO do, but what NOT to do, which is every bit as important.
When I got back to my room, I did a second piece, trying to change some of what I didn’t like about the first one. This is still a quick, journal sketch but I like it better.
Perseverance always pays off. If at first you don’t succeed and all of that. TRY. TRY. TRY. As artists we are constantly struggling with a very fierce enemy – OURSELVES. We are our own worst enemy. We have to get out of our own way and just have some fun, for heaven’s sake!
There you have it. To be an artist is not easy. As a matter of fact, it’s sometimes work. But heck, somebody’s got to do it. Why not us? We are truly the luckiest people in the entire world, don’t you think?
So, go ahead. Take on the most beautiful, complex subject in the world! If you get out of your own way and keep your mind focused on the subject in your sites, you’ll be fine.
You’re an artist, after all. Yes! You are. Don’t argue.
Be brave. Be sure of yourself, no matter what.
No beast slaying skills needed.
DON’T FORGET ABOUT OUR SURPRISE THAT ARRIVES ON JUNE 1st!
We will put the announcement on Facebook and it will also be on my website. If you are signed up for my newsletter, it will be delivered directly to your inbox. See you then and thanks so much for reading! (I’m excited about my announcement, can you tell)?
Kathie
I like them both! Kathie, your words of encouragement are always so right-on! You can do therapy as you teach! Thank you! Painting in Spain for a month…can life get any better?
Thank you Kathie for this heartfelt article that is full of feelings I can put my thumb on. Your words describe exactly the process I often go through when sitting with brush in hand. It’s great to have words put to these feelings and a solid suggestion of how to handle the mental end of painting !! (By the way this process works when playing golf … I’ll have to remember to not let the beast get the better of me!)
Enjoy your trip.
As I was reading this blog I, too, was thinking these are the same ‘head demons’ I deal with on the golf course…and I see you have the same experience. Self talk of the positive nature does lead to more success! Just have to keep at it with each new painting experience or round at the course. BTW I love both paintings!
Your must have put up the wrong picture . It looks wonderful to me. Thanks for the inspiration.
Kathy, way to hard on your self I think its great! Besides wax covers it all !
Hi Kathie
I really relate to your message! Every painting begins with oh no Can I do this? The end result chases the spooks away, but they are right back the next painting.
Your message totally makes sense. While we did the 30 Day Dwg Challenge, it almost always took 3 shots to get the subject correct. So my new mantra is practice, practice, practice and do it again.
It must be wonderful to be on such a location with all the subject matter close at hand. I will do this one day…
So glad I took the time to read this… no truer words were ever spoken about the demons and the process! Thanks for sharing as I am about to go into the studio and design a few new things and your words really put me in the perfect frame of mind to go and CREATE!!!!
Can’t imagine that you struggle with the same is
sues I do. Perseverance is my downfall. Going to try to hang in with both feet.
I love your comments, your paintings, your valuable tips and your subject matter. I work for a company that manufactures custom doors. My family visited Spain (Madrid, Barcelona and Murcia) a few years ago and one of my treasured memories is of the many beautiful old doors that are everywhere in Europe. Thanks much for the inspiration!
Your words on our OWN critical nature is spot on. I have found if I really like a subject/setting/etc. I will push the known boundaries (itty bitty s“y committee) of my skills to new levels. It might take two steps forward and one back a few times but I generally pull it off. Certainly learn from it regardless. Kick the beast to the curb!
Thank you for reiterating the obvious which I keep forgetting. Do have a little devil on my shoulder from time to time. Looking forward to June 1st announcement. Like the first picture and love the second which is softer. The first one would work great as a batik. Glad you had a wonderful trip. 🙂
Wow – I too like both pictures. So excited to see what all you are doing!! In this case, before and after.
I too will try my hand at drawing … kind of scarey..
What are you doing inside my head? Having the same thoughts? And I thought it was just me!
I kinda like the first one!
Your comments are spot on as usual, it is so great to have a teacher who is real! I like both pictures but , I think I also vote for the first one a little bit more too. Have a great time in Spain but come home safe. Keeping you in my prayers for your safety and those you travel with.
Gosh, all of you are so nice to comment about both of the pieces. And YES! are you kidding me? The beast within never goes away completely, but we can definitely learn to tame him. A big part of that is learning that we don’t have to be perfect. It’s okay to be less than perfect. Phew. That was such good news for me, because I am not perfect.
You guys are the best. I’m a very lucky girl.
RIGHT ON!!!!!
So true! We all battle that same demon, no matter who we are. Each painting seems to have a moment of crisis for me. I call it, “the ugly adolescent phase”. Just as with our kids, some times I have to dig deep to find the ability to love the painting through to maturity. That’s why having numerous techniques in your tool box can be helpful. You are such a good teacher Kathie! I just loved spending time exploring Spain with you, but I never saw these little paintings while we were there- I think they’re both lovely!
You are too funny….but right on about the beast within. Can’t wait to see you at Liz’s in Raleigh in the fall…hope we paint one of these beautiful doors! Linda
Kathie, yout tips and encouragement are so helpful. We all need from time to time and little jump start to keep us creating and learning.